Friday, May 11, 2012

My old Friend the Witness

I have started journaling. Truth is I have always journaled, almost. I did it allot as a kid in middle and high school yet I could barely read whatever I would write and always threw away everything I wrote. I realised that it is all about the person and not the wrights. I would be embarrased because out of creativity I seemed to manifest numerous personalities. The many moods turned to scare me because I could not trust myself, which one of these ten people am I?
    The solution is to abandon the hope of fluid identity. Throw the rules by the way side, and if in one way or another my writing would often critiqued, why not write something that I wouldn't be scared to stand by. If I could stop being so pretentious and just write honestly and love myself than what criticisms could possibly bring me down.
    So about my journaling, it seems to be the sweetest and most honest emmision possible. I dreamed the proccess back into my routine / daily or nightly actually and all for the purpose of clearing my anxiuos, restless mind. I spend hours thinking of so many things just like anybody else but I can't stop. I decided I needed to write these things before I try to sleep or the efforts will be frivolous and painfull (as usual ).
     I am a person that likes to debate intelectually different ideas, debate in a civil and diplomatic manner, the kind where neither side is trying to win but sharing knowlege, experience and theory in a way that we might learn.
    So night after night I debate with people that are not even there. I'm sure it's a little insane but it's just been that way forever. And, if it hasn't been evident yet than one could gather that I am an insomniac. These days when I feel sleepy at 11pm, I lay down and write. I always reach the point were I can't think anymore- what a Miracle! There really is an end to the early hours of madness.
    It is known to us that we forget almost everything we learn each day. If I have any prollific discoveries or profound Ideas I just write a few of them down and they have been sticking till the next day quite well. Also, if you want to retain information than sleep less. Six hours is all I really need but when I am really clear minded than I can do four and it serves me very well.

No comments:

Post a Comment